Am I a bait?

Things that happened long ago.
Things that I could never erase from my memory, my heart, my everything.
Yet, all through these years I had managed to throw it far deep inside my heart.
But, Today. Again.
You reminded me all of it, dad.

You had stirred my emotions.
You reminded me of all that.
Made me realize that, how old I get, I still can't run away from the truth.
I still can't run away from those memories.
I still....

This is something that I wish I could erase, burn.
But you reminded me dad.
Why? I wish I could ask you.
But.. Hmm..

I didn't expect this from you.
Never ever did I.
I'm not sure if I could throw this far away, again.
Thanks for scratching the scar that was healing, dad.

And, I never want to do all those things that you ask me.
No matter how bad she is, I can never talk like that.
Because, grandpa didn't raise me like that.
I can never talk like that.
That's why, I can't ask you all these.
This is why, I become dumb when my heart asks so much of questions.
Questions that I don't dare to ask.

I don't know if I should be happy of my behaviour, that which is not being able to talk rudely with others.
Or to be upset because, I can't voice out everything that I feel.

This is the place.
The only place I could show all that I feel.

Day out!

Had a long day with little but big brother today.
Or better to be described as tall and thin brother who is a younger brother. hee..
It has been a longg time since we had a good time together.

All that has been replaced today.
Nice lunch and a little shopping. ^^

How he looks now, I don't really prefer it. :p
But, he's still my brother. Nothing can change that fact though.
I wish the best for him. I always want to see him happy.
I always want the best for him.
He may not understand what I'm saying now.
Hope he'll understand it soon.

May God bless him with a mind that can think rationally.
Entertainment and too much of freedom is not good. Seriously.
So. May everything fall in place for him.
Want to see him in a good position.

At night, went to temple.
Heard things that are disturbing. Not what the priest had said, but what my aunt commented.
Hmm.. God knows what is the best for me.
May He guide me.

Haiiisshh.

It takes more than just patience to talk with those who are elder than you.
Anyone who don't want to agree, can come and see me personally. :p
We shall discuss about it! :P

Yea. I'M just so short and hot-tempered.
People, young or old.
You should respect everyone's opinion.
If someone is saying something, don't say something that is like totally opposite of what one is saying.
Even if you don't agree with it, say it in a good manner.
DO NOT HURT OTHERS!
WORDS ARE SHARPER THAN SWORD!! *Figuratively as well as literally*

I may not like what my brother does. Nor I'm saying that my brother is right.
But when you say something bad about him, done't expect me to keep shut!
He's my brother! Mind it!

Wish I can say back things.
But. what to do.
I'm not good at doing that. :/
So sad. :(

Oh god. Give me the strength to control my emotions.

Good Night people.

New room..

Starting today, I'm one of the tenant in Blok Siti Khadijah, which is just next to my old block.
And, this is officially my third room in 6semesters.. :p
the first time i moved, because there was some problem with the administration n bla2..
and now, I had to shift because my old room 'bocor'.
Ermm. It rained in my room whenever it rains cats and dogs.
So, i had to move because the rain water falls directly in my bed and table.
I had been going through like for 2 years.
Can't take it anymore, so shifting was the best option.
An today, with my darling friend's help.
I had carried all my things from the fourth floor of Siti Fatimah to the third floor in Siti Khadijah.
I feel that it is worth it since the room is nice and clean. ^^

So thankful to Little Siew Chen.
Don't know what i would have done if she didn't come and help me.
was so touched actually. :')
Very hard to find people who really want to help the friends', right?
heee..

So, may this new room give me more good things and not centipedes and rainfalls. heee..
Very tired, right now. :/
Gonna hit the bed soon! :D
Night peeps. ^^